The Caregiver's Guide to Overcome Compassion Fatigu

By Veronica Hislop 

Whether you are a mother, daughter, grandmother, wife, or girlfriend... Whether you are old, young, middle aged, married, single, widowed or divorced... Chances are if you are a woman, you will be called upon at some point in your life to become a caregiver and nurture another human being.

Many women who work in the workforce nurture in that realm too. They are the nurses, teachers, social workers and personal support workers. According to Statistics Canada (2014) 82% of employed women work in the Health Care & Social Service industry - that number is 75% in the US according to Department of Professional Employees Coalition of National Unions.

The number one disease affecting women today is Compassion Fatigue - burnout and it correlates to the nurturing care giving role.

Here are some simple ground rules for you to follow in order not to burn out and succumb to Compassion Fatigue:

a) Learn proper breathing

b) Prioritize your needs

c) Develop your support systems

a) Learn Proper Breathing

The importance of learning to slow down your breathing and practice meditation/relaxation is well documented.

Slowing down your breath and shifting to belly breathing allows you to quiet the Amygdala (the stress centre of the brain). In doing this you are able to lessen the sense of overwhelm that you might be feeling, which in turns allows you to gain some perspective regarding your situation or circumstance. You cannot feel stressed if you are breathing deeply and slowly.

Breathing deeply and slowly allows you to connect to your inner self; the wiser healthier part of you that is in tune with what is important to you and your own life. It allows you to gain clarity. This does not take away from the people who are dependent on you; in actual fact it adds to the betterment of their lives, as you are now in a place to acknowledge that you exist too. Twenty minutes a day of slow/deep breathing is all that is needed.

"It is only when you "quiet" the brain that you can hear and see the opportunities available to you."

b) Prioritize Your Needs

Many women become totally immersed in the care giving role and continuously putting the needs of those who depend on them first, that their needs (if addressed) go to the bottom of the list. This can result in a depletion of their own personal resources.

Prioritizing your own self care is not only necessary - it is wise. Without doing so, energies become exhausted thereby creating a space for anger and resentment to creep into the care giving relationship.

Some women may feel that prioritizing their own self care is selfish, but a simple reframe of the word selfish to the phrase self interest is, is what is needed. If caregivers are not interested in themselves and their own self care then how can they take good care of those that depend on them?

"Taking care of ourselves means that the people in our lives get the best of us and not what is left us."

c) Support Systems

Caregivers are often hardworking, competent and strong women who continuously do for others that they not only forget that they may need help and support, they are reluctant to ask for it. They don't want to look silly, or seem weak, vulnerable incompetent, they don't know how to ask for help and thus keep going it alone.

Taking on a broader view of support may make it easier for women to embrace this concept. Support doesn't' just have to be provided in the form of people, it can also be resources, activities or experiences - essentially anything that grounds and relaxes us. Any action that creates space, replenishes, inspires, motivates, validates and can provide comfort and peace of mind can become a part of one's support system.

In this regard, spending time petting your dog on a regular basis (if it is enjoyable) can be classified as an activity that is part of a person's support systems.

"Smart women know when and how they need help and they are brave enough to ask for help when needed."

Mastering your mind through breath, developing healthy self care actions and forming support systems will enhance mental health and overall wellbeing. This not only highlights your responsibility as a caregiver to yourself, it is the ultimate gift that you can give to the people in your life that you care for.

Veronica Hislop Author, Presenter is the founder of Em-Powered-Solutions, Life Relationship Coaching. She works with stressed caregivers who want to have better inter-personal relationships with the people in their lives.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Veronica_Hislop/2236444

The "Did You Lose Weight Already?" Athletic Wear

By Aisha Jones  

"You're too fat to go to the gym." That is literally the thought that prevents many women from heading into the gym, yoga class, or Pilates studio. It is this recurring thought that haunts their dreams, steals their peace, and inhibits their progression to the woman she wants to become. What if there was exercise apparel that could make you feel more comfortable, less exposed, and even contain the jiggle while you get your sweat on?

No, this isn't a dream. You didn't rub a magic lamp, and this article is not sent from your skinny future self in a parallel universe. As Glenda the Good Witch said, "You had the power all along, my dear." This magical athletic wear has been all around. You just have not been paying attention.

So let's see what athletic wear you could put on that will have people saying, "Did you lose weight already?"

You need something to camouflage the lower half of your body. You can try to go with baggy sweats, or you can do fashionable yoga pants. The only problem with yoga pants is that the other name for yoga pants are cellulite spotlighters. So what you may need is something that can suck in some of that jiggle. If only Spanx made yoga pants. But wait! They do! And there are many other brands that make yoga pants that bring everything in or have built-in tummy controls. A simple online search of "control top yoga pants" will bring up a variety of options. Slip on a pair of these lifesavers and you will already look like you have started slimming down.

You need something to camouflage your midsection that is a little more muffin top than six pack. You can opt for a baggy t-shirt or choose a draped, long tank top. The style of a draped tank top covers up any muffin issues, yet you also look more stylish than an oversized t-shirt. You will also want to get a longer t-shirt so that it does not ride up when you are reaching up for the pull-up bar.

You need something to camouflage your arms. You could try an oversized pullover sweatshirt, or you can get a stylish workout hoodie that has a zipper down the front. You will wear the hoodie unzipped to help break up the outfit and help you look slimmer. Obviously, you can't wear the hoodie during yoga, so just take off your jacket at the last minute right before class. During class, everyone will be too busy holding the treetop position to worry about your arms.

In general, you should not wear the same color head to toe to work out. Most women's initial inclination is to wear black from head to toe in an attempt to look slimmer. However, breaking up the outfit into different colors will help to break up the eye line and should be a mix between dark colors and light colors. If you are bottom heavy, wear the dark color on the bottom and the lighter color on top. For example, if you are bottom heavy, wear black yoga pants, a lavender drapey tank

top, and a white lightweight zippered hoodie. If you are top heavy, wear the darker colors on top and the lighter colors on the bottom.

The proper stylish athletic wear should be a step towards helping you to achieve any weight-loss goals by making you more confident at the gym.

Aisha Jones is a wardrobe artist and creator of Style Recipe Cards. Get her FREE 7-PART COURSE "How to go from Plain Jane to Captivating & Chic" at http://www.NoMorePlainJane.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Aisha_Jones/1200536

Women@Work Series: Feeling Invisible at Work?

By Yawa Hansen-Quao 

Do you feel invisible in your workplace? Perhaps you work very hard, are very reliable and responsible. Your boss and co-workers count on you to make things happen but somehow you don't feel as though you are truly valued. Perhaps you feel by now you ought to be in a position of higher authority than you find yourself. How do you draw some positive attention to your work and present yourself as a woman worthy of promotion and recognition in your workplace? The following is a true story (although the names are changed to protect the innocent!).

Ayorkor is a very ambitious career woman who works for a well-known accounting firm in Accra. When she joined the company she estimated that in five years, she would rise to the rank of senior manager. However, she has been in her company for eight years and has only just broken into the ranks of middle management. It seems like the harder and more steadfastly she works, the more she seems to be ignored.

She also has felt betrayed by others who have presented her ideas as their own. Most recently, while having lunch with some of her colleague managers, she shared her ideas on how she believes the company can improve their billing systems. Days later during a management meeting, her colleague raised his hand and asked to share an insight on how the company can improve its billing processes - you guessed it - the exact ideas that Ayorkor shared just days prior. Months later, her colleague was rewarded with a promotion to senior management - the exact promotion that Ayorkor had had her eyes on for the past three years. Ayorkor now feels so bitter and unappreciated she is considering quitting her job.

Ask almost every employer and they will confirm to you that as employees, women are generally productive and efficient. We learn to multitask and manage the to-do list and take great satisfaction from crossing completed tasks off the list. On the other hand, companies place a higher premium on critical and strategic thinking, which impact the bottom line. This is evidence that the attributes that are most valued and respected in the workplace may not be what women are most naturally inclined to. This means we have to work extra hard to develop the skill set that best positions us for success and promotion. If you find yourself feeling invisible and ignored, I recommend the following:

Double-check your appearance

It is easy to overlook the ways we may be shortchanging ourselves professionally through the way we dress and comport ourselves. A major question to ask yourself is: what message is your appearance sending at work? Research reveals 55 per cent of how you are perceived is based on the way you look; 38 per cent is based on how you talk, and 7 per cent is based on what you say. So like it or not, people tend to judge a book by its cover. Your personal grooming and comportment are therefore critical marketing tools that could position you for success. Obey the old adage: dress for the job you want, not the job you have!

Think and act strategically

Women are often predisposed to behaviours that work against our success in the world of work. For example, many of us are inherently caretakers. This is what makes us excellent when it comes to empathising, connecting and building relationships. However, the tendency to care for others can impede productivity and teach others to become overly dependent. Constantly look for ways your work can impact the bottom line. If, for instance, you have ideas for improving revenue-flow or work processes, it's always good to send those ideas directly to a decision-maker. If you are serious about a promotion within a specific time frame, do your homework and begin to add on the skillset or qualifications that will make you the best candidate for that position.

Know that if you don't speak up, somebody else will Generally, people judge what you know based on what you find words for. Being unable to articulate what you know is therefore synonymous with not knowing. The smartest employers know that those who speak up are valuable assets especially if they convey insights that are critical to the success of the organization. Confronting your fear of speaking up during staff meetings, or taking the lead on a project can really boost your prospects for promotion. Unless you learn how to speak your mind in an assertive manner, you shouldn't expect to rise into leadership.

From henceforth, I encourage you to consider whatever challenge you face at work as an opportunity to self-examine and reposition yourself for success. Until next week, win at work!

More @ Midel Media

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Yawa_Hansen-Quao/2235161